About Parental Alienation

Parental alienation is a campaign by one parent to disparage the other parent in the eyes of the children.  Parental alienation behavior occurs in order to increase dependence on the alienator, “get back at” the Target parent or any number of other reasons. The Target parent eventually sees decreased contact and increased hostility from the children.  In a non-divorced situation children alienation does not occur without physical abuse.  And even then it rarely happens.  When alienation occurs in a situation involving divorce without physical abuse, the cause is the other, alienating, parent – intentionally or unintentionally. In a divorce situation alienation occurs in approximately 20-25% of the cases whereas it occurs in for all intents and purposes in zero, that’s right, zero percent of non-divorce cases.  These statistics demonstrate clearly that alienation is a product of one parent’s behavior during and after the divorce.

Parental alienation of a child from a parent is child abuse.  Nothing less.  And while physical abuse heals, abuse via alienation is much longer term and more difficult to heal.

There are many techniques to accomplish parental alienation and reputable experts and informed judges are aware of them. Unfortunately, there are many judges and experts who are not well educated in the subtle ways in which a parent can alienate a child from the other parent.  Add in the naivety of many judges and experts in how a concerted effort over time can impact a parent-child relationship and in some jurisdictions one has a situation in which one parent can alienate another with impunity.  The solution is to educate judges and experts with information so as to remedy the situation.

Some courts and experts may disagree through naivety or just being too busy to look at the case, but the evidence is overwhelming that parents who have the best interests of their children at heart do not alienate.  Alienation only occurs when parents engage in a campaign of behavior to disparage the other parent and does not occur otherwise. Alienating behavior alone is sufficient to strip the parent of all parental rights in order to reverse the damage but courts are often reluctant to do so for a variety of reasons, further damaging the children involved.  The damage is long term and very difficult to repair and is considerably worse than physical abuse.  Many experts and judges are ignorant about alienation, lack empathy and lack knowledge about the topic.

Parents who are on a mission to intentionally destroy the relationship between one parent and the children are unfit parents by definition.  The Target parents are helpless when the children will no longer communicate and the other parent refuses to abide by terms of agreement and encourages alienating behavior.  The only hope is the court system, but often the courts fail.

To do that, you need to ensure that you are educated and your attorney is too.  Your attorney and your experts can then educate any judges who are uninformed about parental alienation.

Please note that as an attorney for nearly 20 years, I can’t give you legal advice, but I can help give you information in order to help your attorney educate the Judges, experts and Court system.


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